Creating a Support System- Faith and Hope

***Did I take long enough to post the last part of this series?  This post was the most important to me so I was thinking a lot and writing a lot and re-writing a lot and then I got hit with nausea and exhaustion (another baby coming guys!).  But I'm finally ready to post and it seems fitting to post this in the middle of a bleak winter***


I wish I had realized sooner that there were many simple things I could have done right from the beginning of residency to start building a support system for myself.  For a long time I pridefully tried to do most things on my own.  It didn't take long for me to realize I needed to allow others to help me and at the very least let them be aware of my life and struggles so they could have greater compassion and understanding for my shortcomings.  Having this support system earlier on would have made my life a lot less stressed.  
I want to talk today about the thing I could not have gotten through residency without: 
Faith and Hope

**If you are not religious I would encourage you to still read this post.  I cannot separate my beliefs from my experiences but I do believe that everyone has hope in something and I think no matter what you believe you can find some kind of encouragement here.

Bet you thought I disappeared.  I have been pondering the last post of this series for quite some time.  My In-laws left this summer to serve a mission for our church.  They both spoke in church the Sunday before they left and my mother-in-law spoke about hope.  I've been pondering over her words and reading some of the sources she shared in that talk.

You may not be religious or believe in a higher power but I have been religious my whole life.   However I never had the need to put my faith into action more than when we began residency.  When all was said and done, above all else the thing that has supported me and sustained me, the most is my faith and hope.

There were many times that I had no other support immediately around me.  You can only ask for help so many times before you start becoming a burden on others.   I felt alone many times and these were the times that I knew the only person that understood me were my Father in Heaven and Jesus Christ so I knew I needed to put my faith in them.

Hope, on the other hand, does not necessarily have anything to do with a higher being.

A large part of residency I struggled with depression.  I didn't realize it at the time.  A lot of what I held on to was just the hope that things would get better.  To be honest, there were many days that the misery felt never ending.  I couldn't really imagine things better.  I would hear now and then people say how worth it residency was and how much better things get after but I didn't know if I believed them.  But I had to have hope.  I had to have something to look forward to and hold on to.
Sometimes the goal of post residency was too far removed to help much so I would hold on to more immediate hopes, like a chance to be together for more than a couple hours as a family with an upcoming break.

 My mother in law shared the talk, "An High Priest of Good Things to Come" by Elder Jeffery R. Holland (November 1999 Ensign). Elder Holland is one of my favorite speakers and people and this talk is just fabulous.  You really should read or listen to the talk in its entirety now and especially when you're feeling low and hopeless.

I will just share two of the quotes I love the most:

"Everyone has times when we need to know it will get better...For emotional and spiritual stamina, everyone needs to be able to look forward to some respite, to something pleasant and renewing and hopeful, whether that blessing be near at hand or still some distance ahead.  It is enough just to know we can get there, that however measured or far away, there is the promise of 'good things to come'.

He then shares a story of when he was a young father and was discouraged at his present circumstances.  And looking back he gives this advice to his young self that I think is so encouraging.  He says, "Don't give up...Don't you quit.  You keep walking.  You keep trying.  There is help and happiness ahead....You keep your chin up.  It will be all right in the end.  Trust God and believe in good things to come."

So that would be my message.  If residency is feeling tough or hard or long or like its just getting old, remember this:
It will be all right in the end.   Believe in Good things to come.